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FAIRIES AND OTHER SUPERNATURALS:


Our heroes and heroines all need supernatural assistance

From Puss in Boots

(Jack has just discovered the Arthur, the cat, can talk)
  JACK: So you CAN talk! But how?
ENTER FAIRY FORTUNA
  FAIRY: It was me!
  JACK: Ann Widdicombe!
  FAIRY: How dare you!
  JACK: Amazing! First, I'm lumbered with this mobile fur-coat, and now I'm accosted by something out of a myth.
  ARTHUR: Are you a myth?
  FAIRY: No, actually- I'm a mythith! I was once married but no longer.
My wedding vows could have been stronger.
My error could not be concealed;
My husband's faults were soon revealed.
He was not really what I sought
In fact, a thorough spoil-sport.
I wanted fun- he stayed at home.
You see, he was a garden gnome.
  JACK: But this still doesn't explain what you're doing here!
  FAIRY: I am the Fairy Fortuna- I should have been here with you sooner.
 But the traffic, my dear!
Thought I'd never get here.
Please excuse me this fleeting lacuna.
  JACK: Pardon?
  ARTHUR: Granted.
  FAIRY: I mean, this unpard'nable pause. No doubt you would welcome the cause?
I was scheduled, you know,
For the start of the show-
One of pantomime's principal laws.

The Fairy should enter Stage Right,
A vision of goodness and light
Instead, I came on
With a kink in my wand
And looking a terrible sight.
  
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